Contempt, judgment, and adolescence

Contempt is a difficult emotion to define. Susan Heilter describes it as the opposite of empathy, and a mix of disgust and anger. Contempt occurs when we judge someone as being inferior to us in some way (anything from hair and clothes to religious beliefs). Judging others, which evokes the emotion contempt, feels good because it creates in us feelings of superiority. And in that difficult developmental stage that is adolescence, feelings of superiority are a short-term antidote to the ubiquitous feelings of insecurity.

Now I'm not suggesting that all adolescents are contemptuous individuals (far from it actually), or that contempt is reserved for the young (adults "use it" to feel good too). However, adolescents may be particularly vulnerable to a judgmental mindset in an effort to manage their own insecurities.  And adolescents know it themselves - you only have a listen to a group of adolescents in conversation for a short while before you hear statements such as, "Don't judge me". Helping adolescents find other ways to feel good about themselves, ways that don't involve judgment and contempt, is key in helping them reduce their insecurity and foster genuine self-worth.